The concept of waiting is that which is applicable to all creatures, at one point or the other in our lifetime.
We wait for different things such as answers to prayers, examination results, someone, some news, resolutions etc.
Some waiting is definite because there is a known timeline, while some leave us in limbo because we are not sure of when the waiting period would be over. As a result of this, we express different dispositions during our period of waiting.
These dispositions can be in the form of anxiety about what would be, fear of the unknown, joyful anticipation, dread and so much more. Let me mention this before continuing that our disposition while waiting most times will be a determinant of the outcome of our waiting. Our disposition, especially if negative, can eat us up so much that we might become blinded to reality and end up taking a wrong step or decision.
This article, “While waiting” is going to come in a series and in this particular series, let us rub minds on while waiting for a life partner.
A lot of people erroneously believe that this issue of waiting for a life partner and entertaining the notion or the fear that time is running out on them is only applicable to female folks. This of course is a sham!
As much as the outlook of this on the female folk might be different from the male, both folks experience this. This outlook exists for the two at different levels/degrees and for whatever reason.
Some weeks back while having a conversation with some people, a colleague shared the experience of a brother-in-law who is just approaching his late 20s and who is already feeling so desperate for marriage. He feels the time is running out on him and so tries all his possible best to ensure he gets serious with most of the ladies that come his way, even when there is a need for him to flee from such. She expressed how concerned everyone in the family has been, appealing to him to calm down and take it easy. I had to ask to know if this guy in question was of good looks, good job and all. Alas, answers to all the questions posed came out in the affirmative. So, I was able to rule out that his anxiety is not because of his bad looks because I learnt he’s good-looking, the anxiety did not stem from a lack of financial stability, he’s got a great and well-paying job. I guess at this point, some of us would be like, so what’s his stress? The truth is we really can never be sure, even he might not be so certain of how and why he got himself into this frantic phase.
Apparently, this matter affects both parties for whatever reason, which might include but not limited to family pressure, peer pressure, societal pressure and self-inflicted pressure which might have stemmed from living our lives based on other people’s standards. Social media is not helping matters too, as a lot of people keep feeding themselves with illusions and fantasies that are far from reality.
So, what do we say about this situation of desperation to settle down in marriage?
For the married ones, what do you have to say about this?
What do we have to tell ourselves who are in this waiting room?
How do we encourage others who feel life is not fair to them because it’s their belief that they are staying too long in the waiting room for a spouse?
Have you got a personal story to share that you think can lift someone else’s spirit? You can choose to remain anonymous.
What do you have to say to encourage a lady or a guy out there to not give up on living life, but to focus on living and fulfilling purpose while waiting.
Please, let’s rub minds on this topic and help each other to take that step, the bold and giant step to living a fulfilled life while waiting.
14 thoughts on “While Waiting…(1)”
This is so lovely and am sure it’s timely and will surely meet d questions going through so many people’s mind. Thanks for ds piece ma. Attitudes while waiting goes a long way to affect the results. Believe me, waiting is not easy at all,I have awaited for some things before now, admission, child and presently too am waiting for certain things,but while waiting,live your life happily. Waiting is part of life. While waiting,pray,serve God ,not doing it as eye service so a man or a lady can notice you,NO,do it with the sole aim of worship to God. Secondly, work on your character,don’t say my partner will love me for who I am,who are you?. If you eventually have that partner and he/she is acting just as you ,will you be satisfied?…Above all,let God direct your path. Hear from the Holy spirit.. may our waiting worth it at the end.Amen
Very true, attitude while waiting goes a long way to determine the result.
I like the question you posed in your second point when said “who are you”? Lol 😆
Like I pointed out in my book, replicate whatever you want to see in your partner in yourself, bring values to the table as well….
Thank you Aderonke for your contribution laced with personal experience👌
A Man of God I really respect made a statement ……”if you can’t wait for Isaac, you’d give birth to Ishmael that will fight Isaac”….
It’s just a wake up call for young persons out there who throw out this beautiful and uncommon virtue called patience.
In a speedy quest to quit singlehood ,find themselves in a constant struggle to regain their joy and happiness that their so called marriage has taken away from them ,which a simple exercise of waiting upon God for “Isaac” would have brought abundantly .
Growing ones-self and and intentionally developing yourself morally, spiritually ,financially and otherwise is a great way to stay “positioned” to attract the right kind of a spouse into one’s life .
Hmm, very insightful😊
Prayerfully and patiently wait for your Isaac, so that you don’t give birth to Ishmael that will fight your Isaac👌
Thank you for your contribution.
Prepare for the things that you pray for because sometimes the delay is in your preparation. As people of faith be willing to let God prepare you. No one is saying waiting is easy but while waiting be preparing and pray in faith knowing that God is faithful to keep his promises
Very true that most times than not, any delay encountered in life turns out to be for our own good, if and when we understand and maximise it well.
Thank you milady😊 for your contribution 👌
Thanks for this piece ma. For those who are in the waiting room, be careful that your actions don’t become factors that will undo whatever may comes your way at the end of your waiting season. While waiting for whatever, keep living, I meant, living life to the full, only, remember the wisdom of the king of Israel, you will surely give account of all that you do under the sun. Some account starts here on earth.
Blessings
Thank you for your contribution.
It is note worthy like you pointed out that while waiting, one should keep living👌
Not just living, but living meaningfully! 👍
I waited 13years for our children to come so this topic of waiting resonates with me. One thing I’ll advice based on my waiting experience is that once you’ve done ALL that depends on you, let God take control. It’s easier said than done but it’s possible. You must daily remind yourself that your life is in God’s hands and while you’re waiting get your self ready for that gift. If you’re not ready spiritually, mentally, psychologically and physically the gift may come and you may not even recognise it. So don’t get yourself into a frantic situation because like I said if you’ve done everything that depends on you the rest is left to God and surely at God’s own time it will happen but you have to be ready to receive the gift.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us all😀
I like that you pointed out that one should do all of his/her bit and leave the rest for God. Meaning, one cannot fold his/her arms waiting for a miracle to happen, without living, without acting, without getting ready for that which one is waiting for.
Heaven helps those who help themselves!
Wow, very interesting piece. Thank you so much ma. Really waiting could be very difficult and it feels as though God is silent while you are in that waiting period. But I’ve come to learn that the seemingly silence of God does not mean divine inactivity. God is definitely working for my good and at the end it will speak. I try as much on my own part to make the best use of the waiting period. I wait actively, feeding on God’s word, praying, worshipping Him for I know He is ever faithful, it doesn’t matter how long it takes as long as it’s His will for me there would surely be an end to the waiting. Then also I involve myself and time in anything that makes me happy while waiting and consciously take my mind off the issue. I just get busy with other things that helps. My advice to everyone in the waiting room is to just relax, keep calm, don’t be anxious, trust God as long as you are His child, you are covered. There will be an end to the waiting. Cheers.
Hmm, what you described is what is called joyful waiting or waiting joyfully 😊.
Very true that the seeming silence of God does not mean divine inactivity.
What I’ve come to learn and realise is that while God seems to be silent, He is actually behind the scene working. • Working on the person waiting, preparing him/her to qualify for that which the person is waiting for.
• Working on the thing the person is waiting for.
• It might also be that the timing is not yet right. So, God may be busy perfecting the timing and the circumstances.
Thank you for your contribution and encouragement for others😊
Aunty Mary!! This is a good read!
While waiting, ensure to never stop being good and loving your singlehood. Pray and trust God to the most for you!
Thank you Oluchi!
You nailed it, never stop being good and loving your singlehood.
This means accepting who you are, loving who you are, making the most of your singlehood and being the best of who you should be👌